[Albert takes a seat, comfortable as he can be given everything. He loves William, wants to give him the world, and he accepts the tea with a gentle smile. The cigarette smell lingers, and Albert knows what that means, too. William has been brooding.]
Of course you would feel me, Will. We're connected, aren't we?
[He wants so, so badly to tell William that it's fine. That he should think nothing of it. Lying, however... won't work, not with the strength of their connection.]
...I can understand why you didn't tell me. It hurts, but I understand. You were thinking of my happiness, weren't you?
[ albert is not fine. he can feel it through their connection, in the marks that they have left on each other, disguising anguish for the need to hurt, to possess each other. william knows this now. with his free hand, he comes to curl his fingers in his.
more than anything, he wants albert to be happy -- to find another path together with him. this is their chance to atone. but this is also albert's chance to live. he offers a small smile just for albert, soft but knowing. ]
[ william trusts him in many things, it's true -- just as he trusts that albert will move on properly after the end of himself. it's obvious that louis hopes that william would survive the fall; but william is unfortunately ambivalent on the matter.
the reminder that albert ties his happiness to him, too, makes his heart ache. but they're here now, and he had made a promise to live, and so he will do his best.
he senses the sudden rise of fear in albert, and he squeezes his hand, brows knitting faintly. ]
How does he say this without sounding like an absolute wreck?]
I have never wished for anything more than I wish for your happiness, and that of Louis. While I understand you trying to protect me, please understand yourselves that I want to know everything so I can walk beside you. We are brothers, in my heart. More than.
[His fear mellows out into resignation, the cold and placid feeling he gets when he confesses a particular set of truths. There's nothing beautiful about what they became. All he can do is appeal to William's sensibilities, and hope it makes sense to someone who thinks so differently from him.]
I made you a monster. Don't leave me behind. I'll beg, if I must.
[ william cannot promise him something he's already broken -- william would leave him behind, having taken on their sins and wiped the slate clean, as much as he could. he feels his heart clench at albert's distress, the tea forgotten in the wake of such honest pain, the coldness of his defense mechanism edging in.
he softens, quietly surprised by that. stepping closer, william nudges albert to look at him, frowning. ]
You didn't make me anything. We are brothers and partners, Albert. What I wanted to do was something of my own volition.
[ nobody can make william do anything he doesn't want to do, although the guilt he feels from him says otherwise. of course, there is nothing william wouldn't do for albert and louis, but that's different. he reaches up to cup his face, urging albert to meet his eyes.
don't hide from him. he knows you. ]
Albert... I cannot change what happened back in our world, but I promise you, I won't leave you behind here. All I ask, is that you stay with Louis and the others. They need you.
[When William steps closer, Albert offers the softest of smiles. It means little, he knows, because the trepidation is still there. But he adores this man, as a man and as his brother, in every way. He wants to walk beside him still.
Nothing in that has changed. Just their actions.
He meets William's eyes, his faint smile wavering.]
Stay with them? And what of you?
[A single finger traces the outline of William's gem, then he leans in to kiss William on the corner of his lips, slow and gentle.]
You are not a monolith, William. Do you not need me?
[Now it's Albert's turn to grab William's gaze.]
I know you have Sherlock. I know he is, in certain ways, more wonderful for you than I can ever think to be. I want so dearly for you to be happy. I want you to have peace. To be able to explore this world with all of your heart and your mind. I think of the wonderful things you could do here and it lifts my spirits.
[A small sigh.]
Will, you could change this world. I want to see it. But selfishly... not at my expense.
[ william leans into the kiss easily, feeling albert's lips on his as his brows knit. he has always needed albert -- it was always the three of them, from their childhood till now. that albert wants his happiness makes his heart clench.
he can feel it, too, the desire to be with him, no matter what. even if the endpoint is the destruction of the moriarty name, as they've always planned, william's plan had long differed from his -- they were never going to be destroyed together. he was always the only one, and albert and louis would have the gift of seeing the new world with their own eyes.
his hand comes to rest over albert's finger, wanting his touch as his emerald gleams at the contact. ]
You were the one who gave me a new life. Without you, I would have had none of this.
[ and he means every word of it. albert has given him and louis the key -- but more importantly, they are family. he raises albert's hand in his and presses adoring kisses to the tips of his fingers. ]
Sherlock might be special to me. [ very special -- ] But I remain yours, in many ways. I wish for you to stay with them back in our world, where I cannot be.
[ his smile is soft, and he presses his cheek to his hand now, seeking him out. william loves albert, without a doubt; and he will never leave him. ] But in here... you are mine, and I am yours. And I will show you the world you want to see, wherever we are.
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Of course you would feel me, Will. We're connected, aren't we?
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I apologise for not telling you what happened.
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...I can understand why you didn't tell me. It hurts, but I understand. You were thinking of my happiness, weren't you?
[A fragile smile.]
Forgetting that my happiness is tied to your own.
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more than anything, he wants albert to be happy -- to find another path together with him. this is their chance to atone. but this is also albert's chance to live. he offers a small smile just for albert, soft but knowing. ]
Only mine?
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But this is another chance. The fear of being deserted rises in Albert, a panic that he's forgotten something important.]
And dear Louis, of course.
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the reminder that albert ties his happiness to him, too, makes his heart ache. but they're here now, and he had made a promise to live, and so he will do his best.
he senses the sudden rise of fear in albert, and he squeezes his hand, brows knitting faintly. ]
Albert... what's wrong?
no subject
How does he say this without sounding like an absolute wreck?]
I have never wished for anything more than I wish for your happiness, and that of Louis. While I understand you trying to protect me, please understand yourselves that I want to know everything so I can walk beside you. We are brothers, in my heart. More than.
[His fear mellows out into resignation, the cold and placid feeling he gets when he confesses a particular set of truths. There's nothing beautiful about what they became. All he can do is appeal to William's sensibilities, and hope it makes sense to someone who thinks so differently from him.]
I made you a monster. Don't leave me behind. I'll beg, if I must.
no subject
he softens, quietly surprised by that. stepping closer, william nudges albert to look at him, frowning. ]
You didn't make me anything. We are brothers and partners, Albert. What I wanted to do was something of my own volition.
[ nobody can make william do anything he doesn't want to do, although the guilt he feels from him says otherwise. of course, there is nothing william wouldn't do for albert and louis, but that's different. he reaches up to cup his face, urging albert to meet his eyes.
don't hide from him. he knows you. ]
Albert... I cannot change what happened back in our world, but I promise you, I won't leave you behind here. All I ask, is that you stay with Louis and the others. They need you.
no subject
Nothing in that has changed. Just their actions.
He meets William's eyes, his faint smile wavering.]
Stay with them? And what of you?
[A single finger traces the outline of William's gem, then he leans in to kiss William on the corner of his lips, slow and gentle.]
You are not a monolith, William. Do you not need me?
[Now it's Albert's turn to grab William's gaze.]
I know you have Sherlock. I know he is, in certain ways, more wonderful for you than I can ever think to be. I want so dearly for you to be happy. I want you to have peace. To be able to explore this world with all of your heart and your mind. I think of the wonderful things you could do here and it lifts my spirits.
[A small sigh.]
Will, you could change this world. I want to see it. But selfishly... not at my expense.
no subject
[ william leans into the kiss easily, feeling albert's lips on his as his brows knit. he has always needed albert -- it was always the three of them, from their childhood till now. that albert wants his happiness makes his heart clench.
he can feel it, too, the desire to be with him, no matter what. even if the endpoint is the destruction of the moriarty name, as they've always planned, william's plan had long differed from his -- they were never going to be destroyed together. he was always the only one, and albert and louis would have the gift of seeing the new world with their own eyes.
his hand comes to rest over albert's finger, wanting his touch as his emerald gleams at the contact. ]
You were the one who gave me a new life. Without you, I would have had none of this.
[ and he means every word of it. albert has given him and louis the key -- but more importantly, they are family. he raises albert's hand in his and presses adoring kisses to the tips of his fingers. ]
Sherlock might be special to me. [ very special -- ] But I remain yours, in many ways. I wish for you to stay with them back in our world, where I cannot be.
[ his smile is soft, and he presses his cheek to his hand now, seeking him out. william loves albert, without a doubt; and he will never leave him. ] But in here... you are mine, and I am yours. And I will show you the world you want to see, wherever we are.