albert's words does things to him, brings forth fantasies and warmth and an overwhelming depth of feeling as he studies him, raising their joined hands to press it up against the wall beside his head. in this light, he sees albert even more clearly, and searching through their bond only shows him just how much he means what he says.
he can feel it, too, the trepidation behind his words, the strangest feeling that albert doesn't believe he deserves this, but the instinct to want it overwhelming that. ignis decides to help it along, to quash that lingering doubt once and for all. ]
Then I shall pursue you, my beautiful, lovely, complicated man. [ he says, his chest light but full of feeling, exhilaration and excitement and surprise and joy at such a confession. he says little to that, only leaning forward to kiss his mouth, to seal his own over his as his own thoughts echo. can he have this? can he fall in love with albert, and have his own happiness too? a part of him feels that same guilt, but his passion, his desire for him wins out.
let him -- let them both have this, here and now. and whatever may come, well... ]
[Of course Albert doesn't think he deserves this. This is the most incredible man he's ever met, giving him undivided attention. This is him wanting desperately for the first time since he was young, and purely for the first time. His mind races as he feels the bond between them seem to strengthen in an instant, as Ignis searches the shared feelings and commits to them just like that.
It was a snap decision to be vulnerable, a risk, uncalculated and uncomplicated.
To think all he was supposed to get out of this little meeting was a simple invitation to a date. Now it feels like more, like something resembling courtship, because there's more than just flirtation and excitement in play. There's the true, deep feeling that he'll come to trust this man as much as anyone, that he'll fall into his arms and his bed easier and more often.
That they'll be beautiful, equal, and perhaps even joyously happy. That's the way Ignis makes him feel when he kisses him now, like everything that happened to him until he arrived here was a fever dream of desperation and suffering. William and Louis and even Moran are still close to his heart, but there's room for more, now that he's here. There's room for him to learn, and to forgive, before the worst happens and he's irredeemable.
If this vulnerability and openness comes back to destroy him later, he will at least be able to say he lived.]
[ they cannot have this forever. sooner or later, they'll return to their worlds -- and ignis only hopes he brings the memories of him back into eos, into the oncoming darkness. pressed up against the wall, albert is impossibly, stunningly beautiful, and he reaches out to tuck a lock of his hair behind his ear when he pulls away to breathe.
it was a risk that albert took and it paid off for albert and ignis both. ignis, who is reckoning with his own future, the fact that he will pay for the use of the ring with his eyesight, and the years of darkness that will come for them before noctis is sacrificed and his own purpose, lost.
he swallows hard as he looks at him, really looks, as if this is the last time he will ever see albert like this again, and he wants more than anything to sear it into his own memory. he can't help the morose wistfulness even as he feels overwhelming affection and fascination, the tentative overtures of love and the strong desire to want to be with him. it is a courtship, and as he touches his cheek again, pressing his forehead to his, he can feel albert's own determination, the hope and anticipation that comes with blossoming love.
he knows it because he shares it with him, the desire to take these precious moments for themselves before the inevitable happens, and he cups his cheek to press a kiss to the side of his lips again, soft and gentle. another kiss, holding him like he's something precious. ]
I really should go. [ he says reluctantly, nosing his jaw before pressing another kiss there. he ought to go, but all he feels is longing. ] You must be busy, and I'm distracting you.
[Albert knows this is temporary. Everything in life is mutable, except death, which Albert is all too well acquainted with. That will come for him sooner rather than later, he's sure. Maybe he even wanted it to before he came here, in all honesty. No matter how light his heart is about this, he will always be what he was, and always have done what he did.
If he could do things again, would he have chosen the same path? Would he have chosen to become a devil if he knew how much it would destroy him along the way? That the numbness he learned to use as a barrier would permeate everything and make him a liar, a cheat, a fake?
What will this brilliant, stunning, giving, glorious man ever gain from being with him? He'll think about this later, when he's alone, when Ignis is gone and thinking the most gentle thoughts, when Albert is left with only his shadows and the consequences of his actions. It will make this moment bittersweet, and his decision to confess his feelings will replay over and over in his head, haunting him.
He's going to love Ignis. He's going to fall completely, and utterly, and then the bottom will fall out of it all and he will be alone. That's what he deserves. He'll never forgive himself if he hurts Ignis in the process. Until then, he'll grasp at little moments like this and hold them unbearably tightly. If he's good to Ignis, if he's kind and generous and sincere, maybe the truth won't hurt so much when it eventually comes out. Maybe he'll even forgive Albert, or at least accept that he's doing his best to atone.
For now, Albert's heart is light as he looks silently at Ignis, being studied, being seen. This is something he absolutely doesn't deserve, this affection and kindness, but the way it makes his heart race and his body feel light is addictive, and welcome.
Less welcome is that flash of sadness, of trepidation from Ignis. How he wants to pry, to ask for secrets he wouldn't himself give. How he wants to dig so deeply into Ignis' heart that he forgets how dreadful his own is. So moments like this can take him by surprise, overwhelm him, and give him hope. Every gentle touch is memorable, and he maps out the way Ignis moves so carefully in his mind, dedicates the way his lips feel to a memory that he'll keep close.
This affection... it will undo Albert. But how, and how quickly, he still doesn't know. His voice is soft, hardly more than a breathy rush of syllables, so taken is he.]
You are the most welcome distraction I've ever had, dear Ignis.
[He wants him to stay. This is too picturesque of a moment to let go of easily. He wants to hold Ignis in his arms and be held, to kiss him and breathe the same air. He wants to cling so tightly, just for a moment, that he forgets that he is beyond redemption and not worthy of this at all.
Still, this dear man is a realist in certain key ways, and Albert is, too. Surely he's occupied for most of the day.]
But... if you must go, I understand. You only stopped by to invite me for later. You're probably terribly busy yourself, and we'll see each other in a few hours.
[ how odd now, that the notion of a few hours apart seems ultimately unpleasant, that he will be counting down the minutes until he sees him again. but the adage proves true: that absence makes the heart fonder, and in albert's absence, ignis will contemplate the weight of what has been allowed to flourish between them. albert, who is impossibly complicated and yet absurdly compelling in his own right, is a man who is opening up to him in degrees. there is a kindness under that slick charm, a hidden pain that ignis is just barely brushing the surface of, and he supposes that perhaps it's true that like calls to like.
he looks back at him, really looks, memorising every inch of him -- and yet, it's still not enough -- the longing is overwhelming, powerfully pulsing in the bond that they share, like a siren's song calling out to him. albert doesn't want him to go, he thinks. so he kisses him again, breathes the same air as him before he slowly pulls away, releasing him from his hold.
they both have things to do and places to go, and despite feeling like a reckless teenager, ignis knows that he must leave for the day. he runs his fingers through albert's soft hair again, cupping his face briefly before he definitively steps away. his heart is still racing, even as he picks up on albert's thoughts, skimming the surface of it. despite not being able to grasp them, he can sense that lightness, that wonder.
albert's choice chases the shadows from his own thoughts away. ignis will face them on his own time, come to terms with the inevitable future that descends upon him -- that one day, albert's face will truly only be a memory. ]
So we will.
[ he says finally, with a soft smile. saying goodbye is such sweet sorrow, but they will meet again tonight. ]
I'll come for you in a few hours, Albert. Dress casually, we are visiting some lively places tonight.
[Albert's heart is leaping and he can hardly see the world beyond Ignis right now. The whole scene, the whole experience is so devastatingly romantic that Albert's sure for a moment that he's being wooed. And he loves it. He'll follow this lead, letting Ignis dance him through this place joyously until he finds himself in a better frame of mind and a better occupation than before.
One last, slow kiss, the very act stealing Albert's breath, and one last meeting of eyes... Albert knows this moment can't last forever, that he has packing and furnishing to do, and Ignis surely has many engagements as well. But he allows himself for one last, precious moment to be captivated entirely.]
[ albert's right, ignis is wooing the hell out of him.
it truly is agony to tear himself away -- with ignis realising that spending more time with albert only makes him crave him more, instead of simply satisfying himself with his company. he can't have enough of albert, his wit, his kindness, that warmth and gentleness and yet that sharp edge, too, the strength of his convictions and their shared experiences. their connection is stronger than anything that ignis has ever experienced, and when they part ways, he moves quickly through all his tasks until he's finally, finally done.
he reaches albert's home five minutes early, having washed up with a new change of clothes, this time more casual with a simple black button-up shirt and suspenders, sleeves folded to his elbows neatly. he knocks, and this time he comes with a large bouquet of two dozen red, red roses. ]
[He's utterly enchanted, and the rest of the day goes by in something of a blur, Albert working himself to near exhaustion to keep from the anticipation eating away at him.
When Ignis knocks, he'll be greeted moments later by Albert in a soft, casual, deep purple shirt, the collar unfastened to show his amethyst gemstone at his throat, his own sleeves rolled up much in the fashion of Ignis' own.
He's ready with a greeting, but it dies on his lips at the sight of the flowers.]
[ ignis blinks when he answers the door, surprised. albert has always been a handsome, charming man with a smile that haunts his every fantasy, but tonight, he's gorgeous.
the dark purple suits him, and it takes ignis only a moment to realise that albert, sweet albert is starting to dress like him. he smiles, warm and tender and delighted as he offers him the large bouquet. ]
I am only sorry that they're not as stunning as you.
[ he tells him with a soft smile, musing. ]
Perhaps I should wear green the next time I see you.
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no subject
albert's words does things to him, brings forth fantasies and warmth and an overwhelming depth of feeling as he studies him, raising their joined hands to press it up against the wall beside his head. in this light, he sees albert even more clearly, and searching through their bond only shows him just how much he means what he says.
he can feel it, too, the trepidation behind his words, the strangest feeling that albert doesn't believe he deserves this, but the instinct to want it overwhelming that. ignis decides to help it along, to quash that lingering doubt once and for all. ]
Then I shall pursue you, my beautiful, lovely, complicated man. [ he says, his chest light but full of feeling, exhilaration and excitement and surprise and joy at such a confession. he says little to that, only leaning forward to kiss his mouth, to seal his own over his as his own thoughts echo. can he have this? can he fall in love with albert, and have his own happiness too? a part of him feels that same guilt, but his passion, his desire for him wins out.
let him -- let them both have this, here and now. and whatever may come, well... ]
no subject
It was a snap decision to be vulnerable, a risk, uncalculated and uncomplicated.
To think all he was supposed to get out of this little meeting was a simple invitation to a date. Now it feels like more, like something resembling courtship, because there's more than just flirtation and excitement in play. There's the true, deep feeling that he'll come to trust this man as much as anyone, that he'll fall into his arms and his bed easier and more often.
That they'll be beautiful, equal, and perhaps even joyously happy. That's the way Ignis makes him feel when he kisses him now, like everything that happened to him until he arrived here was a fever dream of desperation and suffering. William and Louis and even Moran are still close to his heart, but there's room for more, now that he's here. There's room for him to learn, and to forgive, before the worst happens and he's irredeemable.
If this vulnerability and openness comes back to destroy him later, he will at least be able to say he lived.]
no subject
it was a risk that albert took and it paid off for albert and ignis both. ignis, who is reckoning with his own future, the fact that he will pay for the use of the ring with his eyesight, and the years of darkness that will come for them before noctis is sacrificed and his own purpose, lost.
he swallows hard as he looks at him, really looks, as if this is the last time he will ever see albert like this again, and he wants more than anything to sear it into his own memory. he can't help the morose wistfulness even as he feels overwhelming affection and fascination, the tentative overtures of love and the strong desire to want to be with him. it is a courtship, and as he touches his cheek again, pressing his forehead to his, he can feel albert's own determination, the hope and anticipation that comes with blossoming love.
he knows it because he shares it with him, the desire to take these precious moments for themselves before the inevitable happens, and he cups his cheek to press a kiss to the side of his lips again, soft and gentle. another kiss, holding him like he's something precious. ]
I really should go. [ he says reluctantly, nosing his jaw before pressing another kiss there. he ought to go, but all he feels is longing. ] You must be busy, and I'm distracting you.
no subject
If he could do things again, would he have chosen the same path? Would he have chosen to become a devil if he knew how much it would destroy him along the way? That the numbness he learned to use as a barrier would permeate everything and make him a liar, a cheat, a fake?
What will this brilliant, stunning, giving, glorious man ever gain from being with him? He'll think about this later, when he's alone, when Ignis is gone and thinking the most gentle thoughts, when Albert is left with only his shadows and the consequences of his actions. It will make this moment bittersweet, and his decision to confess his feelings will replay over and over in his head, haunting him.
He's going to love Ignis. He's going to fall completely, and utterly, and then the bottom will fall out of it all and he will be alone. That's what he deserves. He'll never forgive himself if he hurts Ignis in the process. Until then, he'll grasp at little moments like this and hold them unbearably tightly. If he's good to Ignis, if he's kind and generous and sincere, maybe the truth won't hurt so much when it eventually comes out. Maybe he'll even forgive Albert, or at least accept that he's doing his best to atone.
For now, Albert's heart is light as he looks silently at Ignis, being studied, being seen. This is something he absolutely doesn't deserve, this affection and kindness, but the way it makes his heart race and his body feel light is addictive, and welcome.
Less welcome is that flash of sadness, of trepidation from Ignis. How he wants to pry, to ask for secrets he wouldn't himself give. How he wants to dig so deeply into Ignis' heart that he forgets how dreadful his own is. So moments like this can take him by surprise, overwhelm him, and give him hope. Every gentle touch is memorable, and he maps out the way Ignis moves so carefully in his mind, dedicates the way his lips feel to a memory that he'll keep close.
This affection... it will undo Albert. But how, and how quickly, he still doesn't know. His voice is soft, hardly more than a breathy rush of syllables, so taken is he.]
You are the most welcome distraction I've ever had, dear Ignis.
[He wants him to stay. This is too picturesque of a moment to let go of easily. He wants to hold Ignis in his arms and be held, to kiss him and breathe the same air. He wants to cling so tightly, just for a moment, that he forgets that he is beyond redemption and not worthy of this at all.
Still, this dear man is a realist in certain key ways, and Albert is, too. Surely he's occupied for most of the day.]
But... if you must go, I understand. You only stopped by to invite me for later. You're probably terribly busy yourself, and we'll see each other in a few hours.
no subject
he looks back at him, really looks, memorising every inch of him -- and yet, it's still not enough -- the longing is overwhelming, powerfully pulsing in the bond that they share, like a siren's song calling out to him. albert doesn't want him to go, he thinks. so he kisses him again, breathes the same air as him before he slowly pulls away, releasing him from his hold.
they both have things to do and places to go, and despite feeling like a reckless teenager, ignis knows that he must leave for the day. he runs his fingers through albert's soft hair again, cupping his face briefly before he definitively steps away. his heart is still racing, even as he picks up on albert's thoughts, skimming the surface of it. despite not being able to grasp them, he can sense that lightness, that wonder.
albert's choice chases the shadows from his own thoughts away. ignis will face them on his own time, come to terms with the inevitable future that descends upon him -- that one day, albert's face will truly only be a memory. ]
So we will.
[ he says finally, with a soft smile. saying goodbye is such sweet sorrow, but they will meet again tonight. ]
I'll come for you in a few hours, Albert. Dress casually, we are visiting some lively places tonight.
no subject
One last, slow kiss, the very act stealing Albert's breath, and one last meeting of eyes... Albert knows this moment can't last forever, that he has packing and furnishing to do, and Ignis surely has many engagements as well. But he allows himself for one last, precious moment to be captivated entirely.]
I'll be waiting for you, dearest Ignis.
no subject
it truly is agony to tear himself away -- with ignis realising that spending more time with albert only makes him crave him more, instead of simply satisfying himself with his company. he can't have enough of albert, his wit, his kindness, that warmth and gentleness and yet that sharp edge, too, the strength of his convictions and their shared experiences. their connection is stronger than anything that ignis has ever experienced, and when they part ways, he moves quickly through all his tasks until he's finally, finally done.
he reaches albert's home five minutes early, having washed up with a new change of clothes, this time more casual with a simple black button-up shirt and suspenders, sleeves folded to his elbows neatly. he knocks, and this time he comes with a large bouquet of two dozen red, red roses. ]
no subject
When Ignis knocks, he'll be greeted moments later by Albert in a soft, casual, deep purple shirt, the collar unfastened to show his amethyst gemstone at his throat, his own sleeves rolled up much in the fashion of Ignis' own.
He's ready with a greeting, but it dies on his lips at the sight of the flowers.]
...For me?
no subject
the dark purple suits him, and it takes ignis only a moment to realise that albert, sweet albert is starting to dress like him. he smiles, warm and tender and delighted as he offers him the large bouquet. ]
I am only sorry that they're not as stunning as you.
[ he tells him with a soft smile, musing. ]
Perhaps I should wear green the next time I see you.
no subject
[Albert takes the flowers with a gentle, enigmatic smile, pulling them close and looking at them for a long, fond moment.
Then his head snaps up.]
Pardon me, where are my manners? Would you like to come inside for a moment, or shall we be off?